Retired.

We finished up lunch today and Joe said, “Well…I guess I’d better head off to work.”

Dot:  “You don’t work anymore, Joe.”

Joe:  “What do you mean I don’t work anymore?”

Dot:  “You’re retired.”

Joe was defiant:  “Retired?  I’m not retired!”

Dot:  “Oh yes you are.  You’re 92 years old!  That’s too old to work.”

 

Joe:  “Well maybe you’re too old, but I’m not!”

Dot:  “We’re both too old.”

Joe:  “Well, you can do what you want, but I’m going to work.”

Dot:  “What kind of work are you gonna do?”

Jo:  “You know…The usual.”

Dot:  “So you’re going to sit on the couch and read the newspaper?”

Joe:  “Is that my usual?”

Dot:  “Yeah.  You sit around the house and nap off and on while these young girls wait on you.”

Joe:  “Well that sounds pretty good.  Guess I’d better get to it…”

Communion.

Dot told Joe this morning that he doesn’t need to go to church anymore.

Joe: “Who says?”

Dot: “Father John said so. He said that you’re old enough now and that God doesn’t require you to go to services anymore.”

Joe: “I’m not that old…”

Dot: “You’re 92 now Joe. You’re too old to sin…”

Joe laughed:  “Too old to sin? How can someone be too old to sin?”

Dot: “Well, anyhow we’re not going to church anymore. The Father will give us Communion at home from now on.”

Joe: “I’ll give you ‘too old to sin’…goddamn, jesus christ, sonofabitch…”

Dot: “Are you finished?”

Joe grinned:  “I guess so…”

Dot: “Are you sorry for saying those things?”

Joe still grinning: “No, not one bit…”

Dot: “Well, maybe we should continue going to church then…”

Joe: “That’s what I thought…”