This afternoon, Lois woke herself up from her nap with the most gigantic fart I’ve ever heard.This is what happened next:Lois: “Who is making all of the racket in there!”

Me: “Everything’s okay Lois, you can go back to sleep.”

Lois: “How the HELL do you expect me to go back to sleep when you’re making so much racket that it sounds like someone’s driving a Mack Truck through my living room?!”

Me: “Lois, do you want to know the truth about what woke you up?”

Lois: “Of course I want to know the truth and I demand an apology as well!”

Me: “Okay then, but you’re not going to like it…”

Lois: “Just tell me for heaven’s sake!”

Me: “You passed gas while you were sleeping and woke yourself up.”

Lois: “You mean…I’m the one who was making all the racket?!”

Me: “Yes it was you.”

Lois thought about it for a second and laughed: “Boy, that was a doozy!”

Me: “It was pretty impressive all right.”

Lois: “I guess I’m the one who owes you an apology!”

Me: “Oh it’s okay Lois, I’ve heard worse. I have brothers.”